Winter Count: 2001

Back in 2007 I was lucky enough to be part of a Saturday morning teachers-as-writers group with Matt Love in Newport, OR.ed

One week we did an activity modeled after a Winter Count.  Each member of the group each writes about a memorable historical event / experience that they all went through, although not necessarily together.  Our topic was 9/11 and below is what I jumbled down in a 10 minute free-write.


Blinds Drawn

Still grogy from another fitful night with the baby I collected the various pieces of my uniform, pulled my hair back and staggered to the car.  Too tired for radio, too late to stop for tea, I drove in silence to the unit.  How I hated drill mornings.  Let's all stand around in formation at the crack of dawn and discuss what we'll do as officers in the Navy.  My goal? To be more human and less ridiculous than my instructors.  So, I generally kept silent.

I had only been back from materinity leave about a month and hadn't yet adjusted to 'working', if you could call it that, again.  When I walked in everyone, meaning 10 or 15 immature guys, was talking about plane crashes and blowing up the World Trade Center.  Resolved not to listen to their video game drivel, I took out my reinforced concrete book and let confusion cloud my mind.

A while later, the Commanding Officer came in and briefed us on 'the attack'.  He stoicly stated that two planes had crashed into the twin towers and thousands of people were likely dead.  He encouraged us to go home to our families, but to stay close to the telephone.  As active duty Navy, we could be called to serve.

By the time I got home my husband knew and was glued to horrific and continuously updated coverage.  It was far away from us, and I wanted it to stay that way.   I took my son and went to the park. I did not take my phone.  It was as though our town had been evacuated - no one on the streets, houses with blinds drawn, the only life an occasional dog left outside or squirrel unaware of global issues.

We played in the grass.  I held him in my lap on the swings.  Once he fell asleep I cried all the way home.




Ten years later I am lucky that 9/11 largely did stay far away from my life.  No one I knew was killed.  I did not get pulled into active duty.  I was never sent to Afghanistan.  We have continued on essentially unaffected.  This morning I asked Lawrence if he knew why they were playing taps instead of the National Anthem before the game and he didn't know.  When I explained it, he simply said "oh yeah, I know about that.  I didn't know it was today" and walked to his room to play.